Ever since I was a teenager I’ve had what can only be described as a distasteful interest in the Nazis. Everything about their rule is utterly abhorrent and yet I can’t stop myself from devouring information about them. From feature length depressing documentaries to pulpy comic strips they hold my attention like almost nothing else. So it was with great glee that I rewatched Inglorious Basterds for the third time last week.
As gory, WW2 themed, semi-subtitled films go it is pretty fucking awesome. Sure there’s no subtext or romantic plotline but who the hell needs one when you’ve got the baseball bat toting Nazi killing ‘Bear Jew’ Eli Roth or stone cold super fox cinema owner turned, er, Nazi killer Mélanie Laurent? This said I read a blogger talking about how moved she was when she discovered the ‘deeper meaning’ behind it all which made me spend a good week trying to figure out what the hell that was: Nazis are bad? The Allied forces did bad shit too? Hitler was batshit crazy? Goebbels liked crap films? Don’t fuck with someone twice? If you’re anymore enlightened than I then please, pray tell.
In the midst of all this testosterone and gore there are two brilliant female characters: Bridget Von Hammersmark and Shosanna Dreyfus,played by Diane Kruger and Mélanie Laurent respectively. It’s almost impossible to tell you anything about their characters without giving away huge plot points which the film really thrives on, so for now let’s just look at how suave they are, and see how to make their looks into the perfect date outfit.
First up we have Shosanna Dreyfus: a young, secretly Jewish, cinema owner living in Paris towards the end of the war. Shosanna is headstrong and unwilling to play along with the Nazis, and her bold nature shows through in her clothes, as she eschews t the predominantely feminine look of the time and at times appears to be an errant extra from Oliver!
It is however the outfit she chooses for the climax of the film that we are going to focus on here, as honestly, it’s a darn sight more interesting than her day clothes. Keeping it simple in a red dress, clutch bag, and heels Shosanna fits perfectly in the crowd, and couldn’t be dressed better for what will turn out to be the last night of her life. The outfit, which you can see here in parts, was almost impossible to get a good, full picture of, but you can see a few better shots (including a shitty almost full length screencap) here and here. Being a young woman with little means at her disposal even while all dolled up Shosanna wears no jewellery and avoids trowelling the make-up on.
While the outfit above could easily veer into Coleen Rooney territory keeping it simple with the most basic of props and letting the dress speak for itself means that you look more screen siren than screaming harlot.
As for Frau Von Hammersmark, well, she is a lady of means. Means, style, wit, sophistication, and balls. Bridget is an actress and one who could charm the pants off anyone, me included. When we first meet her, in an underground bar in rural France she is decked out in what she probably thinks is casual, but in anyone else’s book is sharp as fucking razor. Also she speaks German so well it’s made me think about learning it as my 5th language, I know she’s a native, but seriously, I can dream can’t I?
Von Hammersmark’s look is perfect for a day date, an after work meet up, or the supposedly terrifying ‘dinner with the boyfriend’sfamily’ evening. An outfit that’s the ideal combination of prim and sexy yet suitably old fashioned enough to impress even the most dullard grandmother. Fuck it, I’m not even that into girls and I’d marry someone if they were wearing this. The key to the Von Hammersmark look is fit. Everything has to hug you just the right way with nary a pull or stretch: you don’t want to look like you’ve been poured into your clothes, more like they were moulded especially for you alone.
The eagle eyed among you may notice there is no black in this outfit, that’s because back in the 40s black was something reserved for evening wear and funerals, and frankly I agree. Black is such a harsh colour on almost every skin tone and is no more flattering than any other colour. Black does not match with everything, nor does it age well (the fading! Oh the fading!!), and there’s nothing duller than someone mindlessly in head to toe black doing it just because they think it looks chic. It makes you look like a teenage goth, but hey, if that’s the look you’re going for, rock on.
Anyway, I hope this scratch into the blood stained surface of Inglorious Basterds has inspired you to put your opinions of Quentin Tarantino on hold and watch it for the first, second, third, or fifteenth time. If the outfits don’t grab you then surely Brad Pitt, the spectacular gore, or the promise of a shoot-em-up explosion filled finale will.
