Those of you who’ve used vibrators will be aware that there is what I term a ‘burn your clit off’ setting on each one. Most of the time this is a last resort option, an “I’ve been going at this for over half an hour” option, or the “I’m on drugs and need to kick this into overdrive.” or even the “Seriously I just need to get this done.” option. However recently I found that even the top setting on my vibrator was doing nothing. It wasn’t even getting me halfway there. I was thinking about laundry and having a nap, and all the chores I had to do. I started to wonder if my clit was broken, and whether that could happen. And then I realised: the fucking batteries were dying.
Fumbling around in the middle of the night, by the light of a desk lamp I searched for batteries everywhere. Eventually I slumped back in my bed and cursed batteries. Those evil little things that never biodegrade and that litter every desk drawer I have with their half spent carcasses, not quite dead but no longer of any use in my camera or vibrators. Rechargeable batteries are obviously an option but they last for such a short time that they’re hardly worth the effort for high drain devices, and my vibrator is definitely high drain.
The next morning, in a tired, sleepless fog, I contacted Sh! the wonderful sex toy store, asking them if they had any rechargeable vibrators and lo and behold they did! A few days later I found myself tripping up the stairs exciteably holding a new package which contained a Solar Power Bullet Vibrator. First of all, calm your tits, you don’t leave a vibrator on your windowsill for all to see. You actually leave a very innocuous small battery pack, there, but you can always leave it under a lamp, if you’re at all worried about people asking awkward questions. After a few hours you’ve got a fully charged battery, ready to plug in and go.
And bloody hell does it go. Who knew something so tiny and so strangely powered could be so strong? While bullet vibes are reknowned for being rather powerful, this one sets the bar a little higher, as you control the power with a small sliding switch on the battery pack. Those of you are familiar with multi-speed vibrators will know of the frustration of having to go through each flipping setting to get back to the start. Incredibly annoying when you accidentally click ‘next’ in the throes of an intense moment, and even more annoying when you can’t decide what setting to go on, and find yourself going through each one half a dozen or so times. None of that nonsense here: a nice slider that goes from low to high and back again, quickly and easily. Bliss!
If there were any issues with it was simply that the bullet can get a little hot in your hand, which at first rather scared me as I worried it would overheat, but it didn’t, and no-one was injured, so never fear. Overall I was deeply impressed that something so small and solar powered could pack such a punch, in a good way! I will definitely be retiring my battery powered vibes in order to not only get off but feel ecologically virtuous at the same time.
Product provided for review by Sh! Women’s Erotic Emporium
3 Comments
hahaha. The first few paragraphs: been there, done that, bought the VERY EFFING FRUSTRATING t-shirt!
The rest of the post: must take some of this advice and buy something decent!
A combination of having done freelance sex toy reviews and the fact that they come as part and parcel of so many other toys means that I have about seven bullet vibes, not a SINGLE one of which turned out to have any battery power left when the latest one I’d acquired ran out the other day. How am I supposed to explain purchasing that many watch batteries at once? Also, why are the batteries they take such a monumental pain to get hold of at anything approaching a reasonable price?
I think I may be taking your advice on this one.
Those bloody fucking watch batteries are the death of me.